This is the hard part of loving
Updated: Nov 12, 2021
We awoke this morning to the news that a dear, dear friend of ours died last night. In our neighborhood and in our community, death--early death, death at a young age--is not as rare as it should be. We don't ask, "What happened?" because in our community it is the loss of the person that matters, not the cause.
Our sorrow is so very deep. The heartache truly is beyond words because we know that it is not only addiction, it is not just violence that cause death, but also all the traumas and agonies that rest below the surface. It's the irreconcilable experiences of living through adolescence in a family torn by domestic violence or having a parent in prison or sibling die by suicide. It's the never learning how to self-sooth or to ask a friend to stay so you don't have to use alone.
Those internal agonies don't prevent us from loving the people who make our lives richer with their laughs, who touch us with compassion, who teach us patience when they are yelling, "Fuck this world and all its injustices" at the top of their lungs. We need those people just as much as we need each other and we need you.
We awoke this morning to the news that a dear, dear friend of our died last night. We are reminded how fragile we all are, how precious you are to us, and why it is that we live this life in community . . . together.